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Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Runaway Train

"Runaway train, never goin back" Bonus points if anyone can tell me what line that song is from.

I am just sitting in the station waiting for the train to move. The sky is cloudy today and there was some drizzle this morning. As I looked outside before I left the house I thought should I grab an umbrella? Then I thought ah I have a rain coat in the trunk. I am an Oregonian I do not need a stinking umbrella. Well I made it to the train and the raincoat is still in the trunk. I am also wearing shorts.

I find it interesting how the body and people react to weather. Most of the time in my case I never think twice about a rain coat or an umbrella. I just never need them. Or, I should say that I might need them I just never take them. In fact the only thing I might do is to wear pants on an extremely cold day. But, I mean really cold like Oregon ice storm cold. If it was left up to me I would wear shorts all year round. But, those of you who know me know that due to my freakishly short legs and my long torso the shorts I wear go down below my knees. So with shoes and socks on there is a only a small expanse of shin exposed.

Oh how naughty my bare skin out there for the world to see! Sometimes on the train I will cross my legs and my exposed shin will wink at the lady commuters. I know they like it. Sure, they avert their eyes and coyly giggle. But, then they smile and fan themselves with their fancy fans. I can tell what they are thinking. Look at that saucy young lad, daring to expose his shin to the world! Oh to have such freedom in my life!!

It is true! I encourage all to join me in the freedom that I find exposing my shins to the air. You will not regret it I promise you. Stop being a slave to the pant. Instead bare you legs free them from the confines of the fascist trouser. Society be damned!! I will rise up the desires of the Secret Society of Pants!! Oh yes they exist!! I will rise above their desires. I will bare my legs and risk all and in so doing I will win all!!

So, stand with me!! Stand tall men and raise those pant legs!! We will all be the better for it!!
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